A Overweight, bald, African man. He always refers to himself in third person. He fought in the wietnam war were he had his best friend and his father die. He is insane, and somewhat crazy. He also HATES Asians due to his past wartime experience. When he gets old (He is 67) he wants to be a crime fighting ninja lawyer who in his spare time saves the universe from meteors using his super speed and strength. He hopes to one day to save opera Winfree from a meteor. I call him Cheese Slice

Cheese: Now boooyyyy, what did you say your name was again?

Ernie: My name is Ernie S-s-sir

Cheese: And what is that?

Ernie: That my pet turtle S-s-sir.

Cheese: Cheese don’t like turtle. Ya’ll know where turtles are from boy?

Ernie: Well I believe they are from….

Cheese: There from Nam boy! Viet-nam! One of them damn turtles blew up Chesses’s best friend! That dang turtle is a spy! Boy, you best kill that Asian thing before it dun start them next apocalypse.

Ernie: But sir….

Cheese: Ain’t no butts around here boy! Cheese’s wife left 30 years ago! She don’t told me I was crazy! Isn’t that something?

Ernie: I don’t know s-s-sir she might be….

Cheese: Boy shut your speakin hole! Cheese gots one of them idea things the Television talks about! Ok, 

Cheese gonna go grab Shirley and be back in 10 seconds flat.

(

Cheese wobbles up the stairs.)

Ernie: Sir! Who’s S-s-s-shirley?

Cheese: You dun’ gonna find out!

(Cheese runs down the stairs with a M16 rifle.)

Cheese: This here boy….. is Cheese’s girl, Shirley.

Ernie: …

Cheese: Now give Cheese that damn spy turtle! Cheese dun’ about to send a message to them damn viet-cog!

A clean well lighted place:

The King of Depression

Hemmingway, possibly the king of all depressing authors.

Today, writing like this is frowned upon by most of society,  things like alcohol, drugs, guns, etc. Were not taken as heavily as they are today. It makes sense that this story would be a bit confusing for today’s generation. Due to lack of real world experience in today’s books. Back in the day things were not sugar coated like they are today. Books written by Hemingway and Fitzgerald were a hit with people. Over the years things change, it seems like today the thriving books are the ones that are about apocalypses and the future. Back in the 20’s things like Winter Dreams, were popular due to the nature of what  was popular back then.

There are still books that are dark, scary, and joyless today. Hemmingway was able to make a book dark and dreary even in a nice, well lighted tavern. Today if you wanted to make a book like this, you would have to set the scene to be dark and creepy. What adds to the creepiness is that Hemmingway, like the Old man. Was gloomy and eventually killed himself. Authors today don’t really put their problems into a character of a book. Hemmingway real put his feelings into this old man. The waiters symbolize the way other people have talked to him. He lets his emotion and what he thinks other people see him as, into the bars servers. One waiter really didn’t really like him, constantly talking about how much the old man drinks. The other waiter just asked questions, he didn’t want to say anything about the old man.

In conclusion, Hemmingway wasn’t the most cheerful of writers, but still managed to create some of the most rememberable of stories and readings, that still make people depressed today.

Point of View

 Authors Note: I took Curly from the book Hoot and put in his point of view for the first 3 times that things have been stolen or sabotaged on his construction site.

Why would someone do this? For fun? This was most likely some juvenile delinquents “Friday fun night.” But this was vandalism, now I have to make up for lost time and redo the entire survey. So I called the cops hoping too get a excuse for this mishap. But no, Mr. Young Gun said that this doesn’t count as vandalism. Aprearatly ruining someone’s entire 2 weeks’ worth of work isn’t a crime.

I am going to get in huge trouble for this one. All the seats of every vehicle are missing! One of those seats costs around $300 dollars and there are 5 missing! It would be impossible to work machines without seats. Now I have to call Mr. Chuck E Cheese up again and tell him the news, meaning my job is most likely gone. All because of some stupid kids and their hate or deranged love for pancakes. Now the line has been crossed. I’m going to sit here tonight and wait for them,  revolver ready.  

How long was I asleep? Even more important, where is my gun! I don’t see it anywhere! That delinquent is in for it now. I’m gonna punch- what was that? *Crunch* There it is again. It’s outside! As I look to my left there is a big kid digging under my trailer. He screeched started to run when I grabbed him by the collar when the police turn the corner! Perfect! I’ve caught the guy and now this whole thing is over. So now two things remain, I have to find my gun and call Mr. Cheese.